Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Feeling Anxious

Yesterday afternoon I received a phone call that caused me great anxiety regarding an important decision that we are in the process of making, 5 minutes later I received another phone call from the same source again causing those horrible anxious feelings to surface. I immediately starting fretting, and thinking of all the worse case scenarios that could happen. I tried to call a couple of people to discuss what was going on because isn't that what friends are for, but no answer anywhere only voice mail. Then inside of me that small voice of God telling me to not be anxious, just to trust Him in everything and He would work it out and then the words to one of my favorite songs "Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Thee". I wish I could tell you all the questions and anxiety went away immediately but that wouldn't be true. I still have a ton of thoughts and questions in my head regarding how everything will work out but God reminded me again this morning that His plan is so much better than my own. I'm such a control freak that I need to know how every t will be crossed and every i dotted but God is the one in absolute control of our lives even though I tend to only be hanging by my fingertips at times. You know I have this mental picture of me hanging onto a ledge and when I get tired and anxious God is right there with His shoulders just letting me sit there to continue hangin on. What an awesome thought about our ever faithful God.
By the way I did receive phone calls later that evening but God had already done the work and I could actually laugh about my anxious feelings. The situation is far from resolved but I do have perfect peace.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Rachel,

I am happy that you are able to wrok through your anxiety so quickly. I feel like mine is tenuous; one minute I'm trusting and another the anxiety swells within. I'll pray that God will continue to make his plan known. I'll be honest, when David felt lead to move here, I felt really resistant but as I trusted David I was able to see God working. You will see that too.

Anonymous said...

Rachel, I am the last person to talk wisely about anxiety. I do know that God works in mysterious ways. I've struggled with it often & I try to remind myself that God says not to worry or be anxious & it's hard to switch focus & let go of the issue & give it up to Him. Sometimes just knowing that he knows the future & he's planning it & my patience sometimes is a bit short can redirect thoughts. It sounds like you worked through it well though! I'll have to reread this blog next time my heart is beating through my chest. Thanks for sharing!
~Laura

Leah said...

Hang in there Rachel!